Whether you’re new to couples counseling or just new to the idea of online couples therapy, you may have some questions. Much of the online counseling process works in the same way as in-office sessions do. There are some minor differences, but they aren’t significant. In some instances, online therapy isn’t recommended. But, all things being equal, online therapy is a good option during this time of pandemic social distancing.
The Platform
Your therapist is required to use software that ensures confidentiality and privacy. Many online therapy platforms can be easily accessed through a link sent from the therapist’s office. Zoom is also frequently used. You may receive a link for this or the meeting ID and password. When you log on to some programs, you’ll sit in a “virtual waiting room” until your therapist joins you online.
As long as your digital device is relatively up-to-date, you should have no problems using these platforms. Importantly, many health insurance companies are currently providing coverage for online therapy.
The Process
As with in-office couples counseling, your therapist will take the time to get to know both of you through your video session. Their evaluation will help determine what steps come next in the course of your sessions. You’ll probably talk about the history of your relationship, ongoing struggles, and what has brought you to counseling.
Typically, both you and your partner will meet together with your therapist. Occasionally, your therapist may want to work individually with one of you. It’s helpful for you to come prepared with your own questions when meeting a therapist online. You’ll want to ask about their approach, training, experience, and if they’ll offer a truly neutral setting as you work through your struggles.
Some clients do find that getting to know each other may take a bit longer over video than in person. However, video still allows your therapist to read your body language, tone of voice, and facial expressions. These nonverbal communications are important in couples counseling.
Set Goals for Therapy
Your therapist should discuss goals for your sessions with you. These include the length of therapy, the primary focus of therapy, and tangible differences you’d like to see in your relationship. While one particular issue may have brought you to therapy, your therapist may see a bigger perspective than you’re able to.
Often, therapists will lay out suggestions for you to work on at home between sessions. These are important to do. You don’t want to be in therapy forever; putting their advice into practice goes a long way toward that. Small steps are always a good place to start.
Effectiveness
Many studies have found that online therapy is equally effective as in-person sessions. People often find this very helpful to know.
The pandemic aside, online therapy is a great option for people who have disabilities, live a long distance from a therapist, have very busy schedules, or want to maintain anonymity. (You don’t have to worry about colleagues or friends seeing you at the therapist’s office if you’re meeting online.)
If, after a few sessions, both of you feel like your therapist isn’t a good fit, that’s ok. Therapists know that clients may need to switch to someone else. They can likely recommend other counselors in your area that you could visit.
Evaluate
After a month or two, take the time to evaluate the progress of therapy with your partner. Check in and see how each of you thinks it’s going.
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If you and your partner are considering couples counseling, I encourage you to reach out to my office to learn more. I have extensive experience helping couples work through a variety of issues. I also offer online sessions.